Fuel bills too expensive this year?

Not got two pennies to rub together?

Then why not rub together the amazing

2Stix*

Exclusive to The Monkey's Brain

Based on traditional boy scout methods (contains no buggery)

Instructions

1. Obtain a print-out of this page twice

2. Cut carefully around each piece

3. Roll-up large stick pieces and glue at tab

4. Place small cuttings in empty ashtray

5. Rub 2Stix together above tray

6. Once smouldering occurs drop 2Stix into tray

7. Enjoy the warmth of a real fire

Handy Hints

Place marshmallows on cocktail sticks and toast above the roaring fire for a lovely American treat

Put a potato in foil onto the fire for wonderful jacket spuds

Use a squirt of lighter fluid to inject new life into the dying embers

If you have difficulty acheiving a fire try using a match instead on the cuttings - do not strike it just rub it gently with 1Stix

Disclaimer: The Monkey's Brain accepts no responsibility due to neglect or misuse of this product. Any houses burning to the ground are not The Monkey's Brain's fault. This product is not guaranteed to work and if it does then Lord have mercy, miracles do happen - blame God.